Lab Notes Blog

Introduction 

This lab note is all about a tiny tool from the improv comedy world you can apply in your professional life. I’ll share a real story about how it worked for me.

A story from the field

Once upon a time, in an office far away…

I'd started working for a program manager who supported business clients inside the company. As a boss, "Nobu" was pretty fun to work for, which helped because I was out of my technical comfort zone.

A few months in, I noticed Nobu had a puzzling verbal habit. It went something like this.

Example #1

Me: "I saw the customer's question, and I think we should send them our deck on prioritization techniques."

Nobu: "No, but they're struggling with deciding what's most important. You should send them the prioritization deck."

Example #2

Me: "I noticed we didn't have a brochure for selecting a lifecycle management tool, so I made one. How's this?"

Nobu: "No, but we should review this carefully because clients keep asking about tools. You should also get input from our sponsor, a department manager, and..."

One day, I found the courage to ask Nobu if he noticed that whenever he (seemingly?) agreed with me or liked my work, he said "no, but." I explained how it both confused me and made me feel dismissed. 

Nobu was cool enough – and emotionally intelligent enough – to express humility about his habit. He apologized for the unintended impact and promised to replace his "no, but’s" with something more affirming. Luckily I had a suggestion.

Tiny Tool: the "yes, and…"

Improv comedy is well-known for the "yes, and." These two words acknowledge what has just been said and allow you to offer your own input. This creates a more generative & inclusive interaction. Perfect for the workplace!

The “yes, and” is a great component for a micro-affirmation. Here’s what that might have sounded like using example #1 above:

Me: "I saw the customer's question, and I think we should send them our deck on prioritization techniques."

Nobu, revised: "Yes, and good call – you recognized their biggest struggle is deciding what’s most important.”

Conclusion

How did the story end? 

Nobu made good on his promise! I smiled every time he caught himself with a "no, b--- oops, I mean, YES, AND…" Our working relationship got even better, and so did the awesome work we delivered.

I’ve known many “no, but”-ers in my time, and I wish I could say they were all as willing to learn better ways to serve their team as Nobu was. Hopefully this tiny tool makes it easier to add a little platinum practice to your workday.